These Dreams...
Why do my dead relatives keep showing up in my dreams?
I’ve been thinking about my Mom a lot lately. My dreams have been filled with family members who are already on the other side – Mom, Dad, Bruce – they are showing up nightly and this isn’t typical for me. It’s almost as if Heaven needs my attention and is pulling out all the stops to get it.
Some of it, I am sure, is that my family has some big days ahead. Abby and Scott get married 16 days from now. The following weekend we’ll throw a baby shower in preparation for the newest member of the family. Gracie and Tyler will welcome that little boy sometime between now and June 19. I can’t wait to meet him, love on him, spoil him rotten. It hurts more than a little to know that Mom, Dad, and Bruce won’t be here to welcome him to the world. For that matter, neither will David or Tiny or any of my grandparents or so many other people who are family to me and my girls.
This little boy will have an incredible crowd of witnesses to his life – both on this side and beyond. When I think about all the things that had to happen exactly right for him to exist – all the people who had to meet, fall in love and raise families – I realize that he is (as we all are) a miracle. I am incredibly grateful.
But back to Mom. I’ve been specifically thinking about the prayers she surely prayed while she was pregnant with me. I know this woman. I’m sure she spent every day of those nine months asking God to keep me safe, to guide me, to help me find the right partner and bless me with children and grandchildren. Those prayers are (as Jan Richardson says) “written on my bones.” Mom lived to see all but one of those prayers answered. I know with no doubt that she will be with me when the next one is answered as well. My cloud of witnesses has always been pretty incredible.
The prayers I prayed for my girls as I carried them are also coming true in front of my eyes. I am grateful to be alive to see them. I’m grateful to be where I am in my life – even without Mom, Dad and Bruce. I am surrounded by friends and family who love me, listen to me, and support me without question. I know what it is to be loved beyond all reason. I have a job I love that I get to do with people I love. I have enough of every single thing I need.
Maybe this is what Heaven has been trying to remind me…Gratitude. The world is hard and frightening right now. Even so, my life is amazing. I need to stop and treasure that every single day.
Beloveds, I hope you will take a moment today to stop, breathe, and take in the beauty around you. Giving thanks for what we have is the best defense there is against the despair that is so desperately trying to do us all in. I’ll be praying for you as I hope you’ll be praying for me. We’re going to be ok. No, we’re going to be amazing just the way God created each of us to be.
Nakupenda Sana Marafiki. Bwana Asifiwe.
Selah,
Cathy
They’re all just checking in on you! You’ll have some difficult days and some splendid days ahead. I’ll be lifting you up through all of them!😘🦋
Becoming a Tootsie (my grand name) has been nothing short of a miracle! During the actual birth I think I prayed every minute for my child. It’s a different prayer from when I was giving birth and praying for the same child. It’s definitely the prayer of our ancestors! Once you realize your baby is good then it’s about the grand! Seeing your child kid be a parent is unbelievable. You’ve a big month or 3 coming up. Give yourself grace. Give yourself time to mourn Bruce and each of your parents and special people. They will be with you during these times. Love you so big!